Saturday Morning Post #16: FULLEST LIFE

Regarding:  "One Thousand Gifts" by Ann Voskamp

A critiquing trio, we’d met for a Cracker Barrel breakfast and review of Patricia Hunter’s post, written at Ann’s request, concerning Patricia’s idea to share a journal of 1,000 gifts with two friends. Neither Robbi nor I had read the book, but based on Patricia’s summary we agreed the shared journal was a great idea, offered a few editing suggestions and moved into a discussion of criticism One Thousand Gifts was receiving. It seems the controversy surrounded the final chapter, the joy of intimacy, which opens with the line, “I fly to Paris and discover how to make love to God.” Apparently some have found the thought of “making love to God” offensive. I felt no such offense because, as I told my colleagues, “I know exactly what Ann means!” And, I knew then I had to read One Thousand Gifts for myself.

I love the subtitle, A Dare to LIVE FULLY Right Where You Are. Ann shares a quote from Augustine bringing to light that joy has always been the goal of the fullest life. With a backward glance, she reflects on what Jesus counted a vital component to fullest life when, having less than twelve hours more with the disciples He so loved, “…He took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them…” (Luke 22:19 NIV). She goes on to point out that “He gave thanks” reads “eucharisteo” in the original language, and asks herself the question, “Can it (the giving of thanks) lay a sure foundation under a life? Offer the fullest life?”

Her quest to seize this holy grail of joy by returning again and again to the table of the euCHARAisteo, the table of thanksgiving, serves as the major theme of her book. Readers, hungry for fullest life, who approach One Thousand Gifts with open mind and heart, will find their souls deeply satisfied at this table.

For me, the practice of eucharisteo became a way of life many years ago and I was captivated by her masterful presentation. Chapter by chapter the rhythm of Ann’s story crescendos toward its culmination in the final chapter where fullest life, truest joy is experienced in communion with the Lover of her soul. How regrettable some fail to grasp this high and holy calling. The distinction between those who partake and those who stop short can be recognized in a passage from that final chapter where Ann sees God’s call for oneness as a call to communion. She draws upon Jesus’ teaching in the Gospel of John concerning the union of Vine and Branches stating,

“He’s calling to come and celebrate being made one, and in Him, by Him, to bear the fruit of the full life round.  …there is no real reality, no full life, outside of the relationship with Love, because God Himself wraps Himself eternally in relationship: God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit existing in relationship, an encircling dance of communion sweetest. God is love – everywhere! everything! – and He can only be love because He exists in triune relationship.  …when I am in union with Christ, I too am lavished with the love the Father has for the Son. In union, that love is mine – ours! I can’t simply ignore His serenade because I’m unsure, uncomfortable, uninterested, thinking I’ve claimed Christ as my Savior already anyways. God is relationship and He woos us to relationship and there is nothing with God if there is no relationship.”

There it is! “I’ve claimed Christ as my Savior” – but, “God is relationship and He woos us to relationship.” By faith in the finished work of Christ He becomes my Savior, but intimacy with God is a matter of relationship. The question for critics is one asked by Ann a few lines down in the chapter, “How receptive to God do I really want to be?” In other words, do we only want to be saved or do we want to know God intimately?

There was so much to savor in this book beyond its major theme that One Thousand Gifts could have been titled, One Thousand Words of Wisdom. As readers we come to a book from many different orientations and the message it brings to individuals can be as varied as the needs waiting to be met. The longing to live fully likely served as a universal launching point for readers of One Thousand Gifts, but the paths to that place of fullest life will have rambled in sundry directions.

In conclusion allow me to share the view from where it took me.

“…and the two will become one flesh,” went beyond words for my husband of thirty-eight years and me – it painted the picture of our life together. When Michael was diagnosed with a massive brain tumor and died less than three months later, parts of me were buried as well. From all appearances, my life hardly skipped a beat. It was what couldn’t be seen by the casual observer that was missing – deep within emotions had been deadened so that I wouldn’t feel the pain. My coping mechanism created a host of self-protection techniques – subtle ways of doing and being designed to spare me emotional pain – ever again! Unfortunately, those same emotions need to be free to function in order to experience earth’s greatest pleasures. Five years later I long to throw off this shroud of death in my soul and breathe life once again. This was where my path to fullest life was being blocked.

It’s amazing how powerful our words are – it only took a few of Ann’s to speak to my heart. As so often is the case, the real root of my problem was a failure to completely trust the Lord. She spoke in the chapter, go lower, of palms curled into protective fists and said, “My own wild desire to protect my joy at all costs is the exact force that kills my joy.” Wisdom Words for me. Letting go, loosening the grip was my need. Being willing to open the palm and receive whatever God has for me, trusting that it will be good whether it feels pleasurable or painful. Her words in the next chapter, empty to fill, became my own confession, “I turn my hand over, spread my fingers open. I receive grace.” And, God’s grace will be sufficient no matter what is placed in my palm.

In the final chapter, the joy of intimacy, when Ann fearfully considered a trip to Paris, she said, “I have no idea what those seven days in Paris could hold. I think that’s the point. Wasn’t it time to fully live?” I answered, “YES!” And, you know what, I find that I’m again living fully right where I am.